Jan 29, 2014

The Non-Update

Now it is January 29th.  It has been two weeks since my last post.  And our contractor did meet with the architect and he made all the changes we needed him to make and then we decided to make ONE more change.  I know we should have just left well enough alone, but we didn't. So now it has been 2 weeks with me calling people every day to see if the change is possible and if they will draw it up for me and leaving messages and sending emails.  I think the stress of never getting anywhere is getting to me.  I hope I can hold it together a little longer and I REALLY hope my sanity returns when the house is done.

There is an unexpected twist though: All our loan paperwork is going to expire.  Did you know that could happen?  I didn't.  But this is all taking so long that that is exactly what is going to happen.  We'll have to give the bank updated everything and in another month they'll have to do a whole nuther appraisal.

Even though nothing ever seems to happen, I know that each day that passes brings us one day closer to what "might" "possibly" be a new kitchen.  And I think my kitchen knows it.  And it does not intend to go quietly.  Besides our malfunctioning kitchen faucet (as seen here) things have started breaking on almost a weekly basis.  Cabinet doors are hanging off their hinges, drawers are coming off their tracks, their fronts are falling off and bottoms falling out.  The butter knives have started sliding right out of their drawer every time my back is turned.  The handle on the microwave has busted halfway off, the tiles on my floor are cracking, breaking, coming loose and sliding out of place and my high-tech garbage can, which has a step-open lid with a lock on it, has taken to jumping right off the can whenever I step on the peddle. And SOMETHING is up with my fridge.  The freezer door barely stays closed anymore and pops open every single time you close the fridge.  I've come down in the morning sometimes to find the freezer door standing wide open.  And in a turn of events I can only assume is related, it is now having additional problems.  There is a solid sheet of ice on the bottom that is getting thicker and thicker by the day.  I cleaned it out once, just to find it was back in force the next day.  And every time we open the freezer now, a big puddle of water ends up in front of it.  I'm not sure how to call a repair man and tell him my freezer has continence problems.

Doesn't this stupid kitchen know that if it wasn't giving me such a hard time I wouldn't be as anxious to get rid of it?  It's like a kid before bed time.  If only they would be quiet for a few minutes, I might just forget they are even awake, but they just do not know how to shut up.



HOWEVER, as anxious as I am to tear this Kitchen to the ground, I am also afraid.  Afraid of Finishing.

1.  My children are the Great Destroyers.  They are the reason we can't have anything nice.  What if the second I get my new cabinets put in they color all over them with permanent marker?

2. I blame everything on this house.  Every sadness, every disappointment  every bad day.  And while, yes, this house frustrates me to no end, when it is done, I'm still going to have bad days.  What will I blame it on then?

3.  What if I am bored?  This house has been our every Saturday, every spare dollar, every summer vacation for 10 years.  I'm not sure I'll know what to do with myself without it to work on.


So that's what is going on with me.  Okay.  Enough whining.  Time to go make dinner.  Peace Out!

Jan 16, 2014

It's a Brand New Day

Out of the blue, and for no apparent reason that I can see, I suddenly feel like blogging again.  I don't know why.  And I don't know if it will last.  It is totally possible that I will write every day for week, get bored, and quit writing again for another year.  We'll see.

But blogging is different now, don't you think?  Google Reader is dead and with it went the links to all my blogs and I just haven't found the energy to find them again. I don't read blogs anymore.  Except my mom's.  Cuz she's special.  (And the reader I use to do it it is this one: NextReadr.  It is great.  You should check it out of you don't yet have a reader you like.)  Does anyone read blogs anymore?  I'm gonna say no.  No one is reading.  Which is perfect for me.  Having an audience makes me nervous.  

Blogging is different and I am different and it felt like time for a fresh start, so now the blog is different too. Earth Shattering, I know, but you'll get used to it.


So, why am I here?  Well I'll tell you.  And I haven't written in 9 months so there are a lot of words stored up in my fingers dying to get out.  This might be a long one.  You better hold on to your boots. 

Every time I want to write about my house or post pictures about it and complain about the state of my poor kitchen, I am overwhelmed with a sense of crushing guilt.  Some people have real problems.  I mean, I have real problems too, don't get me wrong, but my kitchen isn't actually one of them.  It is just stupid.  And a stupid kitchen never hurt nobody.

So please internet, just keep in mind while you are reading this that I am grateful to have a kitchen.  I'm grateful to have a house.  I"m grateful for my blessings and know that they are many.  I'm also glad that soon I will have a DIFFERENT kitchen, and hope that it is OK that I am using my money to pay for a new kitchen and not to feed people in 3rd world countries.

Or does the fact that I feel guilty mean that it is NOT ok?

Whatever.  It is too late for guilt.  Events have been set into motion that cannot be undone.

Ha.  I wish that were true.  I feel like every single step of the way I am Conan The Barbarian pushing against that giant wheel with all my might and nothing will ever happen if I don't keep pushing.

Let me lay down the series of events for you:

We were married May of 2002, and moved into a tiny little apartment.  We loved it.  Though it was a bit crowdy:


A block or so away from our apartment was a cute little house for sale.  We fell in love with it.  We took several tours of it and started making plans for how we were going to fix it up.  Cuz it needed lots of work.  New Roof, new water main, new everything.  They were asking $80,000 for it.  We offered $60,000.  They declined.  And we decided the amount of work necessary wasn't worth paying more than that for the house.  So we gave it up. But by then we had the bug.  We wanted to buy a house.  And we wanted one that we could fix up.  What the heck would we do with a house that didn't need any work done on it?  Just move into it and live in it like a couple of idiots?  No Way!

So then we found this one.  Richard wanted brick and we wanted a yard and this house had both:




And it certainly needed some work.


As you might think it WAS a little terrifying inside, but our eyes were so full of stars and paint chips that all we could see was potential and we bought it anyway.  Because we are completely delusional.

We moved in and spent our first night in the house on Christmas Eve 2003.  There were no ghostly visitations or anything.  Turns out it is just a regular old crappy house, not the haunted kind.

So then we started fixing it up.  Worked on it every night when we got home from work.  Worked on it all day every Saturday.  Went to Friend's, Family's and Neighbor's houses to shower and use the bathroom.

Eventually we got the bathroom and kitchen working and then we slowed down a little.  Started working on it only on Saturdays.   And then we had kids and things slowed WAY down.  And here we are 10 years later and the house is not done.  We NEVER thought it would take this long.  If we had any idea it would take this long I don't think we ever would have bought it.  But we're here now.  2 kids and 70 pounds later.

About this time last year I started to despair.  We were making pretty solid plans to tear off and rebuild our kitchen.  And I started to think it was impossible.  The amount of work that needed to be done and the amount of time we had available to do it were at complete odds with each other.  How were were ever going to do this alone?  Especially when I really started working to finish the upstairs bathroom and it took SEVEN MONTHS, a whole brand new kitchen just seemed like a crazy dream.  I tried to keep it to myself though, cuz what choice did we have?

But on June 17, 2013 while we were eating breakfast, Richard said in the middle of the night he had an epiphany.  We were never going to be able to finish this house by ourselves.  And he really wanted the house to be done by our 10 year anniversary.  So we decided to hire someone else to finish it.  Hallelujah!

In July 2013 we found a contractor.  Our Neice's Father-in-Law.  We were happy, but first we had to have the plans drawn up so he could give us a quote to see if it was an amount the bank was willing to give us.  It took about 5 weeks, but the architect finally gave us the finished plans and we discussed them with the contractor and it was going to cost WAY MORE THAN WE COULD AFFORD.   We then spent the next several months reworking the plans, and waiting to hear from the architect and the contractor and then reworking them again then waiting again until we finally have a a remodeling plan we can afford.  But it means we don't get a garage and Richard will have to do all the electricity and plumbing, and we have to finish all of the existing house ourselves.  Yea.

The next few months passed with more waiting and more calling and more emailing copies of plans and more waiting and here we are, January 16th.  Our 10 year anniversary of moving into the house has come and gone. But we are just waiting for the architect to finish the final copy of the plans, and I think our Contractor is meeting with the architect right now to finish them up so maybe we will be able to move onto the next step sometime soon.  I never would have guessed this part, the BEFORE part, would take 7 months.  If you decide to build a house or an addition, it is something to keep in mind.  Try to estimate how long you think it will take, and then times that by 57.

You'd think all this waiting would make me a patient person but no luck on that so far.  Which I think means there is no hope for me.

This is probably enough for one day.  I've got more words, but maybe I will save them for tomorrow so as not to overwhelm your tender minds.  But I'll be back.  And least one more time.  Tune it tomorrow to find out of the contractor called us.  Who knows?  Stranger things have happened!

And of the song from Dr. Horrible's is not still running through your head, it probably should be.  Here You Go.