You're a Robe and Walking Stick

July 22, 2009

(This post is brought to you by Lance, who did it first. Thanks Lance!)

Folks, it is time to address an issue that plagues every single one of us, every single day. Some of us even face it multiple times a day. It is so easy to pretend that it isn't a problem as we go about our business, but then all the sudden we get an email from a French Dignitary and it is written in French! How will we read it? And worse than that, how will we ever respond? Back in the day you had to pull out your highschool French Textbook and spend hours translating and retranslating, but no more! Now, through the miracle of technology, you can translate anything online

This truly is a miracle and a time saving one at that (the best kind) but the question you might be asking now is, "Which translator should I use?" With that question in mind I have tested out a few of the most popular translator programs so that you don't have to. Just review the results below and pick which one you like the best!



Here is the text we will be translating:
Mindless rambling. Though you could argue that this sentence feels more like a prison term than a line of text. Why are you torturing me? Just make me a root beer float so that I can go and put on my wizard costume. I look amazing in my robe and wand. Goodbye.


Freetranslation.com - English to Italian to English
Unreasonable wanderer. Although she could discuss that this sentence hears more loving a limit of prison of a line a text. Why does she torture me? The right mark me one floating soft drink flavored with summaries of root in manner that I can go and I can put on my magical custom. I have a bell' appearance in my bathrobe and in the stick. Goodbye.


Yahoo! Babel Fish - English to Chinese to English
Unconsciousness strolls. Although you possibly argued, this sentence compared to the line likely felt more imprisoned than text. Why do you torture me? Please make my American elegant ice cream, so that you may go to put on my witchcraft teacher clothing. I look astonishingly in mine long gown and the whip. Goodbye.


Google Translate - English to Japanese to Spanish to Japanese to English
Demolition nonsense. However, this court, rather than lines of text, you may claim to feel like a prison. Or harass me? Yo, I like root beer floats, and wearing a wizard costume. I can not go. Call me a robe and walking stick. Bye-bye.


Translatify.com - English to Klingon to English
Being meaningless, the fast movement. This assertion can prove the fact that the text you feel may like appointment of the prison from the line of the ceremony of burial. But why am I tormented? Only do me the navigation of the Blood Wine in such a way that I could go and honor my enchanting suit. I look at my clothing and d'k tahg strangley. Success!



There you have it. I daresay all your problems are solved. Don't thank me. My work is its own reward. Have a great Pioneer Day, and as they say in Sweden "You look fantastic in your bathrobe and trollspa." Bye-bye!

You Might Also Like

10 comments

  1. I'm pretty sure I will be using the Klingon dictionary a lot.

    ReplyDelete
  2. Hilarious! Your next post should be about miscommunications with body language translations.

    ReplyDelete
  3. Good Idea! I'll have to do some research.

    ReplyDelete
  4. I am totally going to make use of the English to Klingon dictionary. I am positive that should make things like work and Relief Society Presidency meetings much more fun.

    ReplyDelete
  5. Absolutely awesome. I love the AOLer translator the best though: http://ssshotaru.homestead.com/files/aolertranslator.html

    "MINDLES RMBLNG!!11! WTF THOUGH U CUD ARGUA TAHT THES S3NTANC3 FELS MORA LIEK A PRISON T3RM THAN A LIEN OF TEXT!!!1!11 OMG Y R U 2RTURNG M3?!?!!?! OMG JUST MAEK MA A ROT B3R FLOAT SO TAHT I CAN GO AND PUT ON MAH WIZARD COSTUME!!!!1 LOL I LOK MAZNG IN MAH ROB AND WAND!!1!11111 OMG LOL GODBYA!1!!!!!!! OMG LOL"

    ReplyDelete
  6. The end of that address is html by the way, not just h.

    ReplyDelete
  7. My favorite? AOLing the Gettysburg Address. Go ahead. You'll love it.

    ReplyDelete
  8. Oh, Abby, that is so great! I just laughed for about 10 minutes. Yeah, I can see a lot of potential with that translator...

    ReplyDelete
  9. Yeah, I've laughed long and hard with that. I love the random OMGs, WTFs, and exclamation points. I've been meaning to do the Declaration of Independence lately, too. Should be marvelous.

    ReplyDelete
  10. Unfortunately in our Ward I have to use FreeTranslation a lot, and I suffer through this kind of thing all the time.

    It never ceases to be funny, tho!

    ReplyDelete