Anger Management for the Internet

Nov 8, 2007

Today I heard about a heated debate between two acquaintances of mine because of something written on one of their blogs, and that makes me feel real sad. However, maybe it was nice for the offended to be able to air their views to the offendee. Maybe a good argument really hits the spot for some people when they are upset. Unfortunately, that usually isn't an option and we have little recourse when we are offended by something we read on the internet. I enjoy slamming the door when I'm angry, but sometimes it's a lot of work to get up from my desk to go over and slam the door. Plus, I always get distracted on the way and start to pick up socks, and then I remember this sock hop I went to once with some really neato streamers but they really only called it a sock hop because they didn't want us to wear our shoes on the new gymnasium floor, and then I can't remember why I got up in the first place. So here is some advice for those of you who read something online that makes you mad.

1) You can post a rant on your blog.
2) Throw things at your monitor.
3) Shut down the internet browser with a very emphatic click of the mouse.
4) If you are lucky enough to be using a lap top, you can close it really hard (don't try it with a desktop PC. It really doesn't work very well).
5) While doing any of the above it often helps release more steam if you shout some expletive, like: "That Really Burns My Butter!" or, "I am filled with much indignant emotion!" or even something simple like, "POOP!"

If none of the above work out for you, and you don't have the offending party to give a talking to, you can always try calling one of those phone psychics. It might be a 900 number, but they are really good listeners, and you can't put a price on that.