10 Reasons it is Awesome to be 30

The age of 30 is a milestone. When you are young, 30 sounds so terribly MIDDLE AGED, that you think you may as well give up on youth and happiness, and resign yourself to mortgages, slow metabolism and graying hair. Well I am here to inform all you young whippersnappers that really isn't the case. And while I do indeed feel older, I want to list just a few of the reasons why being 30 is awesome, and I highly recommend it to everyone.
  1. Wisdom. Yes, my wisdom runneth over. They say wisdom comes with age (they also say that sometimes age comes alone) and what I have lost in energy and enthusiasm I have more than made up for in wisdom and street smarts. (Wow, I could barely type that for laughing.) I think you will find as you go through this list that 30 year olds are wise indeed.
  2. I can eat whatever I want. And because I can eat what I want AND I also know what is good for me, I usually eat very healthy. But every once in a while, if I feel like it, I can make terrible food choices and nobody can give me guff about it. I went out to dinner with some friends recently, and all I ordered was a huge piece of carrot cake. Just cake for dinner and that is it. This particular restaurant has what has been called "The Best Carrot Cake On Earth" (by me), and whenever we go there Richard and I usually get a piece to share which I can never completely enjoy because I am already too full from dinner. So I swore in my wrath "NOT THIS TIME!" and I ate cake for dinner and it was glorious.
  3. Being a mom. Yes, that happens much younger for most people, but younger people also eat whatever they want to. Bear with me. Kids are cool; I didn't realize how cool until I started trying to raise one myself. And now that the kid is here, I am also glad for all my years of childless freedom and experiences, as well as the boundless wisdom I amassed to help me through this parenting adventure.
  4. Being able to laugh at myself. I just read number 3 again. Who writes like that?
  5. Money. True, there is more of it than in times past. But I am also so much less dumb about it than ever before. I have learned to control my urges for purses, shoes, and redundant household appliances that I don't need or have room for and save my money for the stuff I really DO want. It is an incredibly empowering feeling. And these money smarts are brought to you today by "turning 3o and the wisdom that comes along with it".
  6. Confidence. I'm fine with who I am, which, even if I had wanted to say it when I was a teenager, I never ever could have. That kind of thing just isn't done. Teenagers are not really allowed to like themselves. But now I know what I am. I know who I am. I know what I'm good at, know what I'm bad at, and I am just fine with that. If someone asks me to play basketball, I can gladly say "No! I stink at basketball! I choose not to parade my clumsiness about on the court in that fashion!" But if someone asks me to paint a family portrait of them, I will proudly exclaim "Yes! I shall paint your portrait! And you may display it on your wall in all the glory it deserves!" (I'm just kidding. I'm not an artist. But I am good at making up ridiculous lies, see?)
  7. Reaching the age of Authority. I've decided that I am old enough to call young men "Sonny Boy", and young women "Missy" and that I have enough authority in my age to expect them youngsters to obey me when I order them about.
  8. People call me ma'am. This is closely tied to number 7. People call me ma'am, and when they do, I can't help but think 'That's right I'm a ma'am, you insignificant speck! Respect me! RESPECT ME!!' It is quite a heady brew, I can tell you.
  9. Having an excuse for my infirmities and memory loss. Example: "Hey, Elesa! Do you want to go on a strenuous 10 mile hike, packing in all our food and camping supplies?" "No. I'm sorry, but I can't. I'm 30." "Say, Elesa, do you remember that guy with the tattoo of Alexander the Grape on his calf?" "No, I do not. But that is probably because I am 30." See how handy that is?
  10. 40 doesn't seem as old anymore. And since it is coming, as sure as shootin', it is just as well that I get used to the idea. I am also fully aware that when I turn 40 I will look back on this and think "Boy, I sure didn't know a thing", but for now, that is just fine with me.